Another among the Millions !!

Wrapped up in a dusty brown leather over a white shirt & blue denims, 
Raging across the dry cold lanes of Kashmir on an Enfield. 
Giving a damn to the world and its moh-maya, Flying free as a bird over the hazy meadows !!
This was the dream, this was the hope I wanted to near, this was the moment I wanted to capture !!
Ofcourse, Life has always had different plans !!


"Not everything will fall in your plate in a day, everything that you earn here, has to be earned and more importantly deserved", those were the golden words that kept buzzing Vikram's mind. A self inspired individual whose dreams inspired many others in college days, whose dreams only kept getting bigger as the gates were nearing the close. Like others, the guy had no idea that it would be difficult to dream with all the cushion later.
Like any typical Indian parents, Vikram's too had given a lot of stress on securing a government job to ensure a laid back and stable life throughout. Being placed in an Indian IT MNC giant from an average engineering college had given Vikram a small leap. To him, the suited corporates looked bright and shiny. He wanted to be one of them, he wanted to be in that neat looking attire with the responsibility of changing destiny of a firm with his decisions. Like the thousands every year, Vikram joined the IT lane and became one of those many lost faces in the crowd. Everything seemed so perfect in the beginning, even things that he was scared of coping up with, were coming to him as if they were meant for him. This was the dream start he had hoped for, and he hoped the dream would continue for long enough. With the heavy and strenuous training, he only developed appetite for assignment which were provided in the form of project allocations in this world. Clearing a small contest for that, only boosted his confidence before he set into the actual world where he was supposed to be tested and evaluated.

The days were young, the energy was contagious but not so was the environment, and it was not long before it started impacting him. Although he earned some awesome friends in the process, but the highs had almost taken a break, and it was time to only pick the best amongst the lows. His patience was put to test, his dreams were put on hold, he did not know what to expect next, but all that kept him on was the hope that it was only a phase, and as per the phrase, "This too shall" have passed but it did not. The glamour of this fast moving industry had some sharp thorns and for now, all those thorns seemed to have had a taste of Vikram's fortune. It was amazing how the small things of life had started to matter so much.
A Perfect start was important, but if not, this time was only a built up to something perfect in future. Amidst all this happening on one front, he kept himself motivated enough to keep up the fight. His friends stood like pillars he could depend upon, poor fellows had to undergo through a lot of melodrama. His young heart too fell for some hearts around which did not last long enough to yield any results.
" Where am I headed to ? Will I conquer my dreams ? Why was I the only one with all the trouble ?", the questions never stopped.
Time had started to respond, and there was a strong sense of belief that it will change, and will change for good. Thankfully, it did for some time, but as always it could not go on for long. It seemed almost as if everything he tried hard to pull in a positive direction, had to somehow end up in the wrong one. You cannot bet on time, as it never remains the same. The guy who had the capability of inspiring others with his sharp crisp dreams, was not even able to smile with his lips spread wide. There was a difference, a difference which had been clearly created by time.
Heart broken, dreams half shattered, but still the courage to walk up to the same road every weekday and sit infront of a machine which had no answers to emotions but only alerts for deadlines. Where was I ? A rented machine, who could think, design logics and programs for clients of my company who employed more than 60% of my country's literate population only because people in their countries were too lazy to churn their dreams. It seemed more that I was slaved for my own needs, than for my dreams. My mind had scares of my appraisals, my future and it seemed unfair.
My dreams were big, they were wide and deep. They kept me near the shore of happiness, they made me believe it was never a pursuit but only a state.
Today, is a different day, Today is more about going in a direction about which I have no idea where am I headed to, its more about closing my eyes and do what I have been told to. It burns my soul, it intrigues me, it questions me - When do you pull out the plug ?
I looked around me, I saw the same faces, and many who had accepted this to be their fate. I feared being one of them, but today, probably I am also one among them.

The One, who spends his/her share of happiness from Friday night to Sunday evening.
The One, who plans and cancels their personal plans coz of work.
The One, who fails to wish his/her best friends and relatives on their important days.
The One, who has almost vanished from society.
The One, who reaches up people only in times of need.
I am the One, just an another One among the crowd of millions !!
I am the One, who gains happiness when I travel out of my own country and lives alone abroad.

Vikram is not just one, there is a Vikram in all of us, each one of us goes through a Vikram phase in life, but probably the hope is to carry on !!
Life can pull you down for a while, but you can certainly pull it back if you believe you can !!

"The Dream of streaming through the Kashmiri valleys is still a hope,
The Clock might have slowed down the pace,
but the dream is still open wide.....
for the Clock has not stopped !!"

Then, Now & Thereafter !!

Then

"Who's had those stale parathas again ?" announced Radio, and we burst into laughter in a room where someone had just farted.

"Man, I'll miss you guys" was the mutual statement we all shared.

Tears, half curved smiles, expressionless faces, filled up the whole arena of the final year hostel. Damn, Four years of life passed as fuel smoked out at the shores. I walked back to my room, wrapped my camera to put it back and I got lost.

29th August'11....

Four Years Back on the same lane......

"Alarm clocks to wake up ?" who needed them, this was supposed to be the first day in an engineering college, "Engineering" to be precise of whose dreams were filled like mashed potatoes in parathas, here we were, joining together for a journey which was supposed to be of professional education , supposed to end on a happy ending four years down the line.

"Hey, I am XYZ, OJEE rank 00000" were the first line of geeky introducers.

"Hi, I am XYZ from PQR state" were the first line of normal introducers.

"Arey yaar, Hello. So pure taiyaar ? " were the first line of the ultramost normal introducers.

We laid onto our uniforms, a typical blue blazer, and looked into the mirrors.

"Not bad for an Engineer !!" thought of the day.

Walking in groups, and standing tall for the buses to arrive, while few were still stuck finding it hard on the ties. Life had moved on, for bigger & better things. 

One Year down the line, things had changed, People were now pointed pointers. There were 9 pointers, 8 pointers, the evergreen 7 pointers and the coolest of all, 6 & below pointers, coz that was the standard by which we lived now. Fun was maximum at 6 and minimum at 9.

While some had started taking the smoke in, some had developed the taste for sour grapes , and some had just started to accompany them. There were perceptions, relationships and the ever happening weather changes of being a girlfriend - boyfriend thing, That had hooted in like the most super happening thing !!

It happened through the second, the third and arrived the fourth. By now, these 800 odd about to be Engineers of the future, were less of it than they were a family now. From bunking classes together, to standing for the whole year's prestige and the umpteen Cricket / Football matches on the fields, not just the friendlies, but along many friendly fires and white flags in friendly wars, we did not realised, that we shared was not just friendship , but a hardcore relationship.

Arrived days , when we got selected to be paid off after college, but the days were passing by too.

They started in months, lessened to days, and soon to one day, when the whole lot appeared for the last paper of their graduation and broke their nibs on the last sheets.

"Papa Kehte hai beta naam karega", probably kiya !!

The Shiver stuck me, and here I was back to the present.

"Move on, Idhar hi rahega kya ? " here was Ching again, so eager to get back home.

"I wish I could", was all I could whisper to myself.

The Bonds had to split , the tears had to come rolling out, and the promises of "We'll meet again" were again here. We felt bad when our seniors said that, today we felt how bad it really felt.

Now

In a house, where my windows are always open as used to be the doors in hostels. The Air keeps coming in, with the heat of Chennai and the cool breeze of it in the evening.

I wish , they were friends, who popped in every hour of the day. Friends, who had to be sometimes said, "Abe ja, thoda padh bhi le " , "Abe kitna hawa dega saale ".

Miles away from each other, miles from our homes, miles from our wickets and bats, miles from the drumsticks and guitars, but stand tall our memories of the land we cruised through fun.

A Trip planned to meet in December, who knows how much of it may come true.

We've started rocking on the rocking chairs, planning our future, cutting out on our expenses, thinking of the best gifts for our parents, relatives, girlfriend etc etc....

Thereafter

Dreams , which never end. Dreams of delivering speeches in the boardroom, to standup tall as an icon in the family, a BMW at a cozy villa, an Ultimate figured partner and a highly aspired salary.

Strange is life, stranger than fiction, harder in the eyes of reality.

Probably true, "Tum kya lekar aye the, Kya lekar jaoge"

Dream today, ahead and everafter, for the memories which I hold, I have many in those pages, where I flip any moment, I flip a dream.

From racing into the IPL Listing, to designing the fastest machine, to the best antivirus, to the best actor/actress, to the national dance competitions, I've it all in those pages.

Few've started, Few are somewhere around, and those in queue, will boom later !!

Out of emotions or just some quick fingers on the keyboard, F.R.I.E.N.D.S. , This is for You !!

Dream Girl and Hail her !!

Through the blurry vision in green meadows, I saw a girl with her hair rising high to the zephyr across the smooth greenery. Nothing had struck me better as this did. I starred at her like a crow, and yes, all she managed to pass on, was a smile, out of surprise or probably to let go my stare. I paced my steps across the turf, to reach out to her and hold her tight in my arms. By this time, even I don't know how she turn around to me, and was expecting me around , hanging her hands out to reach me. And yes, I almost reached her hand, when she disappeared like a lost leave on the streets.

"Wake up you dumbass, you'll be late again to work", cried out my brother, kicking my ass at a nominal enough speed to shake me out of fantasy. I checked my watch and it said, I deserved it. With few moments that I had to ponder, I sat down on a chair in the other room looking out through the window to the terrifying sunshine of Chennai. Lost in the miles of my dream was I again, and here I was, trying my best to go back to my moment of glory.

Bright and fresh, I reached out to the esteemed daily, and here I was stuck to its contents yet again. In the dreams of my life, where I always neared the princess across the meadows, the forts and heaven, here was a girl, on the streets , in tore pieces of coverings and in a depressed state of mind. The clock was ticking over and so I thought to sit down over it on the weekend. It seems a different day altogether when you already have something running on your mind, while I passed across the hustling streets and boarded along the sweaty crowd, I had a thought running in my mind. Every lady I saw on the way, I visualised the threads she was stitched to in society. Damn yes, for the first time in my life probably, I was thinking this way, probably for the first time I was thinking for someone I never knew, never grew with, never talked with. Had one question, boomeranging my mind, Am I the only one concerned or is this just one of those mornings ?

India 2020, a dreamland where all the aspirations are living by, where all the dreams are resting to hay. About which , every minister lays back on his seat in air conditioned chamber to claim,  "We'll be on the top by then, let us do our work".

I ask today "We'll top on how many lists by then ?"

To name the assured ones from now, Corruption, Crime and Poverty.

Back to where I was roaming about, concerned about the existence of genders on the same grade and same state. Last two weeks of my life have been quite happening and impacting, coz from listening to demands of marriage of a friend's sister to viewing a terrific show on television, all of them asked one thing with a question mark in bold,  ? , loud and clear.

"Is all this nation headed today, is for money, power and credentials on the global trade ?"

None can deny, coz it is headed for that only, its not headed for peace in its own fields , coz the fields are getting snapped by the nuclear deals and the hi-tech infrastructure where the worsts of incidents have happened. From introducing the cheap concept of call girls to the upgraded version of escorts, I see today, Women are catching the eye as a material of entertainment, leaving her degraded of her abilities , coz she's the one who holds the shores of the society. A form of human , who has resisted tons & tons of unjust which has prevailed since ages on her. From the rural lands where people have been accused to be illiterate for the incidents, the avalanche has drifted into the urban lands with much impact, all credit to the literate mind for this.

People say "Shit happens" and they let go things, but what if shit sits on the roads daily. And to be honest, it really does on the sheets of our dailies when every morning the corners read Rapes,Honour Killing,Female Foeticide,Tortures of Dowry,Sex Abuse & the continual use of women as a form of entertainment and a platform to launch all retarded things.

India's most heritage inherited land is the land of most sick things happening to women, Rajasthan, I wish the heritage of yours existed for real in your minds when in the eras of highness, women were roses which never withered away.

Dowry, sick of the retards who still encash women to be married in their families, and a food for thought to the ones who approve it, Kings in history did it because it was a event to be celebrated with exchange of lucratives, not a game of filling up their treasury. 

Honour Killing, Sex Abuse, Domestic Violence have lived all through the years, at some point it was Sati, today its rose a point, when its worser than that. It almost like living through the pyres and the fire of Sati.

Rapes, are stuffed into papers as much as potatoes in Indian dishes, they are in , everywhere.

Sick of the plans and programmes of the government, where a clear proofed sting operation in Rajasthan lies in the court yet to put ban on Doctors involved in foeticides.

In one word, the Y-Gen says "Fuck'em".

From the tunes from what I have gained past my twenty odd years, Women have been everything in a man's life for every good reasons, and genuine ones. Mothers, Best Friends, Best Listeners, Best Philosophers and Best Inspirations, Women O Women, I owe you my hat.

Hats Off !!

I ll hail you forever !!

Presence Appreciated, thanks to Eve that found Adam !!

And there chemistry found us !!

And you are hereby, my dream forever !!

Dreams & Aspirations - Typically Indian !!

In the land where the Legends wrote history and the history made them the rulers of the golden pages of the present, India has been a land where people made it through nothing to everything. Ambani, a merely known surname when born to a nothing to do family , has the world on his feet today. Anil Aggarwal, another such personality who had to bite the dust and cross over the limits to passby the shores where nothing awaited him except success. Not just these "A" lettered people, but many who wrote the script of their lives on their own will and mantras. Life, never had a full stop for them and what it always had were commas, which kept getting added to their achievements, figures and the never ending following.
Today, I stand by those achievements and I too typically feel, passion is what must have rode them through this journey, for life is never a smooth x=y plot on a graph, its always something which has had spikes prefixed by nature and postfixed by human. I stand by reading these achievements and these names piffled out by my friends.   The same urge and the same desires that a youngster typically dreams about in each corner of this nation, our nation is one where we breathe dreams. Not me, not just my platoon of college, but the whole 60% youth population of India who are the high tides on the walls of the world's future. Few choose, fight and falter, while few script, fight and alter.
                           Meant to change and meant to bring the pieces together, not just me , a just earning IT guy in Chennai believes that there are enough reasons to dream and achieve, but the whole setup, inspires you to become an aspirant of what may become the reason to live your life for this nation. Craziness to achieve, the desires to back plan after plan , and the will to go nuts about anything and everything. Life won't stop and it should never, but the dreams shouldn't either, for you are the reason it exists !!

Not everyone is lucky to make the numbers count for real,

Few who believe that these are not just numbers which got discovered,

But figures which made the whole world go round & around,

So why not you today,

That the future blooms and You're the one found !!

~ FlY By ~

Nothing comes as graceful,

As comes talent from heaven,

Nothing stands as apart,

As does truth from the forbidden,

You see a million happy curves down the mile,

what you dont see,

Are often the plastic reasons in those smiles,

Life's been a season & often game,

but there's no reason why there be still complaints,

There are always dreams,

which often fly by,

while there are many,

which just die..

You give yourself a reason,

to stand and live tall,

What you often miss out on,

Is a simple wish,

Give it a push,

Give it a try,

coz there's nothing as delightful,

as is to see self,

Fly by !!

Rock it,

Beat it,

Never just let that rhythm die,

coz for all the different reasons that you end it in a while,

Ders will be a million more,

to Fly By !!

The Reserved and the Unreserved..the eternal battle within

Long back when there was a lost India facing its doom, when even on being one enormous presence on the globe, it was hardly getting its recognition. India was in a lost world, facing the worst of its time, the country was a combination of broken states under different ruling kingdoms - the Royal Mughals, the Englishmen , the Dutch, the Portuguese & many others. While these Kingdoms kept fighting for power in their times, the commons had a huge cold topic settled in their brains. People were cast into classes of recognition, they were provided with a status rank and were treated as per it. The World moved on, but ours stayed the same. Time favoured India and arrived a man with the golden brain - Mr. Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi, & in few years of his presence in the battle of freedom, India never looked the same again. A line which seemed impossible to be thought of earlier, was now at its feet and India was breathing fresh air of freedom without any restrictions for the first time. Thoug the nation had fought its doom & came victorious, but the battle was yet to be won within, where religionlism & casteism had backfired. In came Mr. Raja Ram Mohan Roy, and he made serious amends to the mentality of the masses, he strived in a revolution which raised the thinking of people. Though the move paid rich dividends, but as had happened earlier, the impact did not left a mark on the whole. Years passed by, India kept enriching her presence in the world, the world within calmed down a bit , the masses were happy with her doing good. The war within kept rolling and unrolling, people got divided in sections of General (GE) , Other Backward Classes (OBC), Minorities, Scheduled Castes (SC) & Scheduled Tribes (ST) with certain numerical percentages reserved for them everywhere. The numbers which seemed a respite at first, had ignited a spark, and it was then when India lost her individuality and got bifurcated into several streams of life. Lots happened in between, the mishaps, the reconsiderations, the unexpected wraths, but they stood together against everything. The numbers thus, were infact the boundaries built in between them. And today, when the Nation is nearing its 54th  year of Independence, I just have a feeling that more than the Government needs to, People need to think over if they need these numbers for their presence, coz now is the time when after diminishing these numbers , India can really come up as one giant superpower where her people are standing are right behind her & working as one, instead of being mere percentage numbers in society. Though at the moment, this remains a thought, the execution & amendments remain open to the mango people.

Lets go India, lets march ahead now..!!

A Slow yet steady change - Rise of Bihar

It was August 2007, when I had to leave Patna for my engineering from Gandhi Institute of Engineering & Technology,Orissa. The years passed by, I heard quite good things about the state and the good things kept increasing down the years. Though I always used to come back during my vacations, but I hardly used to get any chance to observe the changes. Today when I used to get any chance to observe the changes. Today when I have completed my engineering, & resting myself in the break I have before joining an organization, I see things have changed for good around me. The People, the core of any developing process, are now much aware of things happening around and are much open to accept new things which they feel is acceptable and not above the line. Though a section of society has always been there which has not accepted the changes, but with the impact of time, they have not been a barrier. The State Government has marched ahead implementing new plans, working on social welfare, has given due importance to commercial development & the future looks appreciable. Due credits to the Chief Minister, who has worked keeping a target in mind on the long run, as thing around were not in a position to take a U-turn overnight. The process has been a bit slow, coz it needed to be corrected from the roots but has ensured to be a steady one. The future of Bihar certainly seems bright as I walk through these lanes of 2011.

Going Across the Limits where the world says "ITS OVER"

 They say its over if you say NO, and its all back alive, if you really want it to be so.True to the utmost level,things in our lives are just a creation of our perception about them.The way we think about things, the way we look after them & of course, the way we react to them.Its the stimuli that really matters, perhaps its not something which is always predictable.There are moments when we realize our real potential and straightaway lash onto them.Its something which is a typical response of a being.Of course,its none but HUMANS.We lash onto things which we find beneficial for us, we run away from things which are of no use.This is something to which everyone has to accede.Everytime things around get messy, they seem grotesque & take hell of a stride into our lives & make it even more miserable.There are instances at the same time where we think its over, we cannot give it anymore & so, we just step behind without even judging for once if it is really so.Things for sure do not change overnight, but its the efforts and the dedication towards anything,a person really wants to achieve.It is all the same as the famous quote says that "Rome was not built in a day" & that's the bare truth.We cannot achieve anything in just a wink, it takes in something to give out something that really matters.Things have changed in this world, people have become smarter.They know exactly what to do and how to do even before it matters.They have many permutations and combinations to make it to their dreams but just a few of them make it through, some of them give it up half way while some give it up saying it was just a try,to make it across their dreams.They try acting complaisant about their faults but why,does it really matters to people around.What really matters is what you do with your own life, screw it up or just tighten it from everyside & make sure that there's no seepage through it & all the sediments are there when you open it up a day.There are perhaps many stalwarts who have done it in the past & there are still many more on the cards who will make it someday.They don't like being noticed,they do not want people's ovation coz to them, what matters is just their complacency.
            There's no words like "IMPOSSIBLE" in the dictionary of achievers coz they make them possible everytime.There's nothing flimsy in their dreams, there's nothing hollow in what they achieve & that's the reason only why, they make it to the other end of the horizon.And as far as things which we see happening around in this world, it is quite gray.The atrocities in this world have become worse.Now, even they exist in myriad shades but its the ones who really perceive it well & make it to the other side where happiness,joy & manifold of theirs exist.And to me, its only them who make the world a place to live and breathe with a will to feel that "AAL iz WELL ".I ll like to conclude my thoughts with just a quote of my own.              

              "Look into the mirror & see what it reflects,

                Sneak into your heart & find what it beats for,

                 Stare at the night sky & challenge the stars,

                Challenge them that you'll be one of them on the earth,

                And, you ll be the one,

                Who makes it to the other side of the horizon, 

                The horizon which has been left unconquered,

             And everything will be yours,

           Your Life,Your Love & Your Dreams" 

RECESSION-You NeVer Know Wats up Next.....

Its not been too long...neither the period has been something really short....but the breakdown of these three to four months has costed many their dreams. Just before Recession struck, there were many who were dreaming of bagging a job whose pay would be in dollars & afterwards, bagging a job even in the national currency was out of the scene.The scene has got even worser with time, the profile of the students have gone to all time low.Especially for those who are pursuing higher studies and were/are on the verge of bagging their careers.With no option left,everyone has now walked out for pursuing higher studies in their respective fields.
Everyone has their own priorities & goals to be targeted once set.And with this rash period on,almost everyone has forgotten about the same.All everyone is thinking about is somehow to meet the basic needs.All we have in hand is a badly accepted compromise whose impact will be there for some good time.Can easily remember times when on meeting the toppers of our senior batch, they used to talk of getting a good job in the giants, as of now they talk of somehow settling somewhere or even being able to make a start.
Sure, this is nothing just a period but for we people who are/were standing at one of the most important stage of our life.Its just like facing this sort of situation was out of expectation.All that is holding us is the patience & self-belief.So,without looking back & getting sad, we are ready to rock and roll.

Come whatever it comes, we are ready to face the blade....!!!!

My love-Its just my life ( just a rap )

Hey Guys n Gals,
b4 u read this,i wanna tell you.this is a rap,so better read it so but its a very touchy rap that just came out of nowhere for me. A line was enough to proceed further...

My love-Its just my life

I just don’t know,
what r u talking abt,
neither do i care,
what it is abt.
i havnt come here,
to take this shit along.
its just my life,
that am carryin along..

doesnt even matter,
who's listenin dis song.
its just for you baby,
that i stood even against the wrong,
i havent even cared,
what am i about,
i just want you here,
to listen me loud,
even thru da shadows of my own,
i ran away,
just for you and dreams of own..
its just my life,
that am carrying along..

why dont you care,
i still love you alot,
that rainy evening,
and dose rainy drops,
dose were the moments,
i still standby..
i just cant think,
y rnt u nearby,
am i still less,
than what you expected to be,
doesnt this matters,
that i walk alone..
its just my life,
that am carrying along..

am walking thru the dark,
these days alone,
but still i expect,
you would come and hold me on,
i just cant see you,
crying like this,
walk by my side,
i ll gift you a kiss,
wont let your tears,
to fall even once,
y cant u come,
leaving ur fears alone,
am still the same,
& love you even more than d days gone,
its just my life,
that am carrying along...

dont know how much,
i would link this to you,
just a little wish,
that i have in ma heart for you,
close your eyes,
and think abt me once,
am i still not in the frame,
where we two are the same,
lots of innocence and the pain,
but its the truth,
we have to face alone,
i wont leave your hands,
whatever may stand,
i wont let you ever,
face your fears,
i ll stand against them,
even if they take my tears,
i just want you,
to be with me,
i love you still the same,
even though,
i have faced the pain,
that's y i expect,
you would come along,
and hold me on,
and hold me on....

One Fine Day...

One fine day,

i saw a dream,

It had all d moments whom i wanted my lyf 2 scream,

all those moments were captured in a reel,

coz it had alot to do with my zeal,

it wasnt only about my name,

coz i wanted to earn a classy fame,

my dreams were in a lock,

till i got a pleasant shock,

down came my chance,

and i stood strong with a hefty stance,

i crossed all the hurdles vich came my way,

till i rested on puffy hay,

it was my need,

coz i wanted my soul to lead,

And it was only possible due to dis special ray- One Fine Day.....